Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

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Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Mon Aug 13, 2018 2:53 pm

New journal - as I'm told my first one is about to be closed. Smile
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Mon Aug 13, 2018 2:59 pm

Good weekend Smile Some projects got done on Saturday, mostly hubby's projects. Sunday we lazed around all day and it was wonderful. Spent the entire day outside - in the sun for part of the day, in the shade for part of the day - relaxing in our hammock chairs or lying in the cool grass under the shade of the palm tree. Smile We tried to see the meteor shower last night but the city lights were too bright, and the sky was a little hazy due to the fires in the PNW.

My gut is off, but as always, its my own fault. I got a little free with what I ate over the past few days.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Narrowminded on Mon Aug 13, 2018 5:37 pm

Tomi - welcome to the new journal club.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Pedidoc on Mon Aug 13, 2018 7:08 pm

Narrowminded wrote:Tomi - welcome to the new journal club.

Yes, welcome!
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Tue Aug 14, 2018 4:02 pm

Smile thanks!

Thinking about my BIL today - hubby's brother. He was diagnosed about 15 years ago with a type of peripheral neuropathy called CIDP and it is getting worse. I believe he must have a fairly serious case of the disease. He was hospitalized for a week about 6 months ago and given daily infusions of immunoglobulin treatments. He normally gets them every 2 weeks. He has to go in every once in a while and ask for an extra treatment because he gets extremely weak and tired. Six months ago when he was hospitalized he was losing his ability to swallow and speak, but after the treatments he was back to normal again. So, yesterday BIL called hubby and said he wasn't doing well and this morning hubby gets a text from BILs wife asking for prayer because they are going to the doctor this afternoon. Hubby is pretty worried.

Can't complain about piddly little troubles - others have it so much worse.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Narrowminded on Tue Aug 14, 2018 8:51 pm

Sending prayers Tomi for your BIL. Hugs
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Wed Aug 15, 2018 2:32 pm

Thank you, NM Smile They reported nothing awful or scary was happening - according to the doctor. So status quo for now.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Wed Aug 15, 2018 2:43 pm

okay - confession time. I have been lazy with my vigilant eating and moving. And I am paying the cost. Crying or Very sad Today I am rather attached to the bathroom and I'm feeling very foggy brained.

So - back to my squeaky clean diet so I will be feeling up to my daily walks. If I could just get it through my thick head that eating a "wrong" food because I'm feeling deprived will only delay my healing - and it deprives me of the freedom I have when feeling good and having no tummy troubles.

UGH!!! at what point do I learn my lesson and this stops being a struggle?
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Pedidoc on Wed Aug 15, 2018 3:36 pm

I think it may always be a struggle. I still think you need to make a list of the foods you may feel deprived of and then next to it list an approved food that you will have on hand to eat instead.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Thu Aug 16, 2018 8:52 pm

Thanks, Pedidoc - I will consider that.

Things are better today Smile I behaved myself yesterday so no gut troubles - but my energy is still lagging so no walk again. I slept late and then it was too hot to do much outside. I cleaned the pond skimmer and filters. I got caught up on business stuff so not a total waste of the day.

I guess I fall into the 3 steps forward 1 step back club. Its hard to be on top of things all the time, at least it is for me. I get lazy and I start to play head games. I will do better. I did excellent for about 6 weeks - and then I made a bad choice at the grocery store. Also - for me, its hard to maintain a really strict diet when the person I live with isn't as committed. Not that its his fault - but it is an influence on my choices.

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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Narrowminded on Thu Aug 16, 2018 9:07 pm

I get the bad influence on the food. Not generally an issue with me since DH gets fed through a tube, but it is when DD is here. She still eats some GF foods that aren’t necessarily primal and also eats a bit more sweets...

You got this Tomi. I’ll be back hard core when she leaves on Tuesday, so we can do this together
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Fri Aug 17, 2018 3:41 pm

Thanks, NM. I start to feel guilty for not having "goodies" in the house for hubby. Kinda like I'm forcing him to eat the way I need to eat - and he isn't always happy about it.

I'm back on track now. I have noticed that I will be more focused and stay on track better when I'm logging everything I eat into MFP so I'm going to start doing that again.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Annieh on Fri Aug 17, 2018 4:51 pm

Tomi, it's really difficult to keep eating properly when others around you are not, especially those closest who have their things in plain sight. Here are a few things I have found helpful in this regard (they don't always work 100%, but they do actually help). Mostly it is to do with my mindset. Truly, it's not about deprivation. It's about choosing the best. All things are permissible but not all things are beneficial.

First of all, a large part of it's about what I name those things in my mind. Rather than "allowed" or "not allowed" there is "food" and "not-food". Not-food definitely includes all those items not on the primal list at all, eg anything processed or packaged and/or containing canola, soy, or gluten or laden with sugar and artificial ingredients. Many of these things are the very things that people thing of as treats. Don't do this, don't call them "goodies", they are actually baddies. They deprive me of health and wellbeing, I don't feel good eating them. When it comes down to it, most of them don't even taste good. Mostly they should be kept out of the home altogether as they really don't do any favours to the people we love either.

Now there certainly are things that I know are better if I don't have but I find difficult to resist. In this case, I would buy white chocolate for my DH as he enjoys it but I don't so it won't tempt me as much as a rum and raisin bar would, for example.

In conjunction with this, I also allocated a shelf in the pantry and a container in the fridge that were for things my DH or DD like to eat but I know are not for me. Things like muesli and muesli bars, sugar, tomato sauce, baked beans. This shelf is "out of bounds" to me and I try not to look at it. So, it's above my eye-level and/or in a non-transparent tin. I remember being very cross with my eldest dd who once came home and baked an enormous batch of non-primal but extremely tempting and delicious biscuits. Despite being under strict instructions to give them away, she kept half, right at my eye level in a clear container. This did not help my cause!!!!

Apart from these very tempting things, primal food is usually the most delicious anyway, so there is really no need to feel deprived.

It's unfortunate that in your case there are also many items that you hope to be able to eat again in future but aren't helpful right now. Would it help if you can think of these as something to look forward to later, rather than being deprived of now? Kind of like a not-yet category, perhaps calling it a "someday" category would sound more positive.

I really wish you all the best, you have six weeks of healthy eating behind you with results to prove it's worth it. Hold onto that and persevere.




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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Narrowminded on Fri Aug 17, 2018 7:16 pm

Excellent ideas Annie. Smile
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by perennialpam on Sat Aug 18, 2018 5:55 am

Such a thoughtful entry, Annie.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Rig D on Sat Aug 18, 2018 7:02 am

Good ideas from AnnieH.
I guess I fall into the 3 steps forward 1 step back club.
Don't feel like the Lone Ranger. I think all of us have this kind of thing going on, at least to some degree. But heck, a net of +2 is good, and you'll eventually get it down to where all the bad stuff isn't that tempting.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Mon Aug 20, 2018 1:02 pm

Gosh Anneih!  thanks for the tips!  I will definitely work on the brain part of this.  Wink  

I should clarify that when I say I ate something off my safe list it is most always cheesecake, kettle corn or adult beverages.  I never go into gluten-land anymore.  And the cheesecake happens about 2 times a year, and IF I get a no chocolate version I never have tummy troubles - I just take a lact-aid pill and I'm good.  The sugar however ill set off my fibro so I am very motivated to limit my intake.  My "cheats" are limited to only those things listed above.  So, its not terrible - but enough to make my tummy hurt and send me to the bathroom multiple times the following day.  

I'm not quite as sensitive to fat anymore as I take fat digesters anytime I eat fat.  I take Beta-Plus, which is for people that no longer have a gall bladder and Lipo Gold with any meal or snack that fattier.  

We had a wonderful weekend!  Saturday afternoon to Sunday noon-ish we were at the lake.  Then spent the rest of Sunday enjoying the patio.  We ate a late lunch on the patio, then both showered and retreated to our hammock chairs for a while.  I watched an episode of Downton Abbey Smile  At 8 pm we came inside and watched part of a movie before going to bed.  

We talked a lot about the remodel.  There is much this house needs to make it meet code and be better for resale, but we don't want to sink too much money into it when we are so close to retirement years.  We have one bedroom and the landing at the top of the stairs that have ceilings that do not meet the minimum height requirements.  They are only 2 inches to low - but fixing it would require raising the roof over that part of the house to match the roof line of the 1998 addition.  Since the bedroom ceiling is too low it is not considered a "habitable" space and cannot be called a "bedroom".  It would have to be called a storage space.  I want to extend the stairs, making them less steep, but that also requires us to fix the ceiling height issue.  So we are sorta stuck between a rock and hard place.   Doing anything at all will force us to do a LOT due to the troubles with code violations.  The stairs are not even to code - they are too steep.  This is what happens when you try to update a house built in 1946.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Narrowminded on Tue Aug 21, 2018 8:04 am

Tomi since the house was built in 1946, isn’t it grandfathered for some of these things, like height? You didn’t build it that way. Around here we have many homes that are over 100 years old and I’m sure our first house would have had the stair issue. However, those things were not even considered as part of code issues. It was more having the right outlets near water etc.

Sounds like a relaxing weekend for you.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Rig D on Tue Aug 21, 2018 10:17 am

Agree with NM, it is worth exploring with the city to see if you are grandfathered. However, I think our city requires you to do at at least some updates to meet code if you are selling or doing something requiring permits, which is just about everything you would want to do to any house.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Tue Aug 21, 2018 7:11 pm

Yes - the house as it sits is fine - until we try to sell, but if we do any type of work/remodel then those things need to be brought up to code. We have been told this by multiple contractors.

At the bare minimum we need to address the crawl space - or lack there of. We've been told it will cost $5000 to dig out the crawl space, lay a vapor barrier and insulate the floor. A buyer will never get a loan without doing that. There is also a problem with the electrical panel, we've been told it isn't to code and that will also need to be fixed in order to sell the house - thats another big ticket item. The HVAC is very old - probably at least 40 years old and is insufficient for the square footage - it was never changed when the addition was built. So, that will need to be done for selling.

Aside from that - the insulation in the walls and ceiling of the original parts of the house is the old mica stuff. It may or may not be the type with asbestos. We freeze to death in the winter unless we keep the pellet stove running 24/7. The HVAC isn't sufficient to keep the chill off in the old parts of the house. The roof in the vaulted living/kitchen area was built using 2x6s and we've had contractors tell us they have no idea why it is still up there. We fear it will collapse. When we have a strong wind gust the entire roof over the living/kitchen area crackles and pops. There is still original wiring in the old parts and when the addition was done and the new electrical panel was put in, they connected that old wiring to the new wiring. That is a fire hazard. We have vinyl siding that is a breeding ground for bugs and it has mildewed. We also have several windows that how lost their seal and need to be replaced. The old chimney is leaning terribly - it must be a good 4-6 inches off plum. That would never pass a house inspection.

Basically the house is a mess. And if we hope to ever sell it we need to fix these things. I can't imagine the mess it would leave for the kids to deal with should something happen to us and they would have to take on the task of selling it.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Rig D on Wed Aug 22, 2018 7:10 am

That is a truly scary list of issues and I hope you guys can find your way through it.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by perennialpam on Wed Aug 22, 2018 8:26 am

Good idea to fix it now since you already know it has to be done so that YOU and your DH can enjoy the updates.

I am probably facing some of the same issues in my 1952 house. I should follow my own advice.

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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by Narrowminded on Wed Aug 22, 2018 9:00 am

Tomi I would definitely take care of the wiring issue post haste. That is a fire issue and based upon the other items, it sounds like a tinder box. Then slowly tackle each item as you can.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Wed Aug 22, 2018 2:18 pm

Our financial plan looks something like this:

1. Pay off mortgage with proceeds from hubby's inheritance. This will happen very soon as we have a buyer and the repairs as per the home inspection are underway now. Fingers crossed for a closing date by end of October.

2. Save up to buy an RV to live in while the remodel is happening. Hopefully this will not take more than a year.

3. Live very frugally and save up the cash for the remodel. Rough guestimation is $150K - $250K depending on extent of work to be done.

We won't carry another mortgage so its save then start. It could be 5-7 years of saving before we are financially ready to do the remodel.
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Re: Tomi found her way - and the quest continues.

Post by tomi1000 on Wed Aug 22, 2018 2:27 pm

Sleep is still a big issue. I'm still taking the Best Rest Formula and the Skullcap. I haven't been brave enough to try sleeping without them. I will see what NP says when I see her on the 31st.

My weight is unchanged and I'm considering what I can do about that.

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